On September 11, 2011, Anthony surprised me that Sunday evening with a note that read, “Sorry, sweet, I had to go. Why’d I ditch you? Soon you’ll know! I know you’re thinking “why?” and “where?” It’s up to you to meet me there! Here’s a hint (so don’t be late) It’s where we sat…on our first date”
With a fluttering heart, I hopped in the car and drove over to Montrose Harbor, where, under a clear night’s sky, Anthony proposed to me.
Nearly one year later, on September 8th, we lived out the vision of our wedding. Throughout the last few years, I’ve shared many of my clients’ wedding images on my blog. Now, as someone who finally lived through the experience of planning–going over and over all the details, crunching numbers, and crafting spreadsheets, I thought I’d share a little about my own experience. For you future brides out there, this is my and Anthony’s wedding story.
Photos by my friend and colleague Sonya Martin as well as one of my second photographers, Anthony’s couisn, Tom Root.
When Anthony and I started talking about wedding plans, we both agreed we wanted something that reflected who we are and involved our family and friends.
Our first decision came on an airplane to California while traveling to our other friends’ wedding. As the plane ascended into the clouds, I thought to myself, “What if we have Don officiate our wedding?” Don is the father of Anthony’s best friend. He’s thoughtful, well-spoken, and he happens to be a couples therapist (I didn’t even realize this at the time, but it was an added bonus when I learned). It was one of the best decisions we made. Don was dedicated to the job, meeting with us every six weeks for almost the whole year before the wedding to get to know me (he’s known Anthony for nearly 20 years) and us as a couple. He was a great source of wisdom and helped us stay grounded throughout the planning process. With two busy schedules, there were times when we felt stressed out and overwhelmed by all the details and tasks to take care of before the day arrived. Meeting with Don reminded us what it was all for: a worthy cause for sure!
When I was still a young girl living back in Nebraska, I remember discovering a box tucked beneath my Dad’s bed with a note scrawled by my mom reading, “Do not open till a Murphy Rife daughter wedding.”
After the engagement, my sister and I cut the seal on the box, and slowly pulled out layers of tissue, till we got to the treasure beneath. It was a magical moment for us to unwrap my mom’s wedding dress from 1979, still preserved, looking great (save for a few small stains.) I love those stains. They were like time capsules, transporting me back to my parents’ wedding night, where I imagined her dancing with a glass of wine.
I stepped into the dress, a long-sleeved, high-necked style fitting of the 70’s. My sister buttoned me up and looked me over. “It fits almost perfectly!”
That was it. I tried on one dress, and only one dress. I was lucky to be referred to a very talented designer and seamstress, Shirley, of Grass Orchids. She and her assistant, Reina, transformed the dress into what you see in the pictures. I couldn’t love it more!
In keeping with the idea of involving friends and family, my dear friend Kelly Feldmiller made ALL of our cupcakes and our cutting cake for the wedding in the days leading up to the wedding. The bourbon vanilla infused, lemon cupcakes were to die for, and the cake was the sweetest, most perfect creation!
Alongside Kelly is my little sister, Neriah, a constant source of entertainment.
My Dad stopped by as I got ready to snap some pictures. Where do you think I got it from?
Top: My BIL (brother-in-law) Ty with my adorable nephew, Reed. BL: Beth stocks her flask with bourbon for the day. BR: Jenn-social media expert, she storified our wedding here.
My sister zips me up in the wedding dress, then gives me a kiss, sending me into a mini-sob-session.
The wedding venue is Anthony’s Aunt and Uncle’s property, a place I fell in love with, like the rest of the family, during my first visit. It’s a beautiful setting with elements that reminded me of growing up in Nebraska. I am so grateful to Jim and Elizabeth for giving us permission to use it!
When Anthony and I showed up to the event, we were thrilled to see all the decorations in place, and vendors busy making the day possible. Hilary Carpenter and her team at Estera Events came up huge for us! Their wedding planning services allowed Anthony and I to relax and enjoy the day, rather than worrying about directing.
About the decorations:
1. Banners: Anthony’s dad, Phil Ponce, creates custom-designed paper cutting called papel picado, traditional of Mexican celebrations (see a video by WTTW Chicago Tonight showing Phil in action and some of his other creations). For our wedding, he used the image of a dragonfly, an important symbol for my family. Before my mom passed away, she said, “think of me when you see a dragonfly.”
2. The Flowers: We wanted to use flowers native of the prairie. Originally we were going to use the flowers on the property where we were married, but the drought last year depleted the supply to an abismal level. Instead I connected with vendors at my local farmers market in Andersonville, buying more than enough for a steal!
3. The Arrangements: The very talented Joanne Lieman of Flowers Flowers designed my and my sister’s bouquets and the centerpieces. The blue bottles in the center pieces were found in Nebraska, Missouri, and Illinois at flea markets and antique shops-collected by my sister, my friends Emilie and Agustina, and myself.
4. The Signs: Built using reclaimed wood from Rebuilders Exchange by Agustina and Johann. I have the best friends in the world!
5. The Altar: Built by myself and Anthony’s mom, Ann Ponce, using PVC piping for ease of assembly and transportation. Unfortunately I can’t sew, which meant Ann had to tackle the drapery. All the fabric was purchased from Vogue in Evanston.
Agustina designed postcards for guests to send after the wedding, rather than a guest book. That way, we had notes to look forward to after returning from our honeymoon. The chalkboard sign was built with reclaimed wood and painted with chalk paint from Blick.
Anthony and I opted to do a ‘first look’ so we wouldn’t lose it too much during the ceremony, AND so we could spend more time together with our family and friends.
The tractor was brought to the property from a neighbor of Jim and Elizabeth. It was a last-minute surprise that I loved!
Top: Neriah arrives to the venue and runs down the hill in excitement!
Our families.
Af few of my darling aunts. Love these ladies!
We were lucky to have our friend, the professional violinist, Dawn Marlowe play the call to processional for the wedding alongside Anthony’s buddy, Cyrus. They played the Ashokan Farewell (listen to it here)
The Processional: The Pixies’ “Where is My Mind?” played by Anthony. This is the moment in the day where I really lost it. The song I walked down to was very special for me and Anthony. My friend, Beth, posted the piano version of it on my Facebook wall before Anthony and I had ever had a first date. Anthony decided he’d learn the song, and played it for me when we started dating.
As the music started, my Dad said to me, “This may very well be the most important moment of your life. You chose well.”
I wasn’t the only one with tears…
Our unity ceremony involved passing around our vows, which we wrote for each other, so each person at the wedding could bless them.
We opted not to have formal seating arrangements, instead encouraging all our guests to intermingle.
Top: Shadow box display of my mom in the original dress, alongside her hat, and my Aunt Beth’s piece titled: One Dress, Two weddings.
Honey Jars were custom made by Custom Love on Etsy.
BL: Cupcakes made by Kelly Feldmiller
BR: Centerpiece wood cut by Jim Root from fallen trees on the property.
The Mariachis were a gift to us from Anthony’s dad. We loved having them!
We LOVED HUE Catering. They made fresh Mexican food, including amazing guacamole, rice and beans, and made-to-order tacos! One of the best meals I’ve ever had!
Anthony’s co-worker at NBC, Rob Elgas, was our gracious host.
Cheers to Don, Anthony’s parents, and The Roots!
Neriah snuck in while we were cutting the cake, stealing the first bite. How could we be upset with this little cutie?
The speeches were…EPIC! Anthony’s Granddad sang a special song for me, followed up by his aunts, sister, and cousins, performing a tune from the Sound of Music.
Anthony’s brother brought down the house, imitating Anthony circa his middle school years.
My sister brought us all to tears with a very moving speech.
My Dad and I boogied down for our Father-Daughter dance.
Then everyone hit the dance floor!
Heidi joined the party!
After the music ended, we headed for the bonfire, a perfect way to end the night!
Last thing of note, with the wedding came a new last name, therefor Maggie Rife Photography will now be going by Rife Ponce Photography. You’ll still be able to follow all my updates here at www.maggierife.com, but I’ll also be hosting my website at www.rifeponcephotography.com.
All the best!
Maggie